Every time I get a new facebook friend that is particularly interesting, I do a re-scan of my most recent posts on facebook and try to see me from their eyes. Admittedly, I do this less now that I am married, and know that there are no new boys perusing the old FB. But recently, just for fun more than personality dialysis, I went back to check on my married life persona. I realized the following:
“If you were to judge me by my 2012 Timeline you would think: I am a baby animal/ Ellen freak that blogs all the time, who recently got married and whose friends are having too many babies, and who has a love/hate relationship with “The Bachelor,” and is still holding out for a new Harry Potter.”
All of the above is completely true. I do love Ellen (because she espouses kindness for all and she’s downright hilarious). And baby animals make me happy when I’m having a miserable streak. And it’s true, three of my favorite friends and my sister just had babies (well, Tiffany will have a baby soon) and I’m feeling the sweet baby feet and feeling like I should be feeling something about a baby. Mostly I just like kissing baby’s feets that are not my own baby’s right now. And it’s true. The Bachelor has been… addicting even though I think Ben is, perhaps, the most disappointing Bachelor ever. And Harry Potter. Well. I will always love Harry.

 

 

 But I wish it was easier to portray how much I love being a wife, while recognizing that this is the newest, craziest, and (occasionally) hardest frontier I’ve ever traveled to. I wish I could tell the world how much I love my husband without being one of “those wives” that comes across as silly and insincere. 

I wish I were brave enough to share my religious and political beliefs. I wish I could tell people WHY I am a Mormon and WHY I’m a Moderate Liberal, but experience has told me that both of those topics get backlash (and usually the liberal people and the Mormon people have very different comments than the other).
I wish people found the literature that makes me salivate as interesting as I do. I wish I could blog about John Donne and start a fascinating conversation about metaphysical conceits. I wish the whole world would read Fahrenheit 451 so we all remembered what happens to a society that watches The Bachelor  on their TV walls all day long.
I hope my readers, and I guess viewers, knew a little more about me. I wish I wasn’t so limited in my ability to share.

  1. Feb 29, 2012
    Brooke

    Amen to everything (except the baby animals. I've never really been into those?).

    Reply
  2. Feb 29, 2012
    Karissa

    I think you should feel like you can share whatever you want and people should take it or leave it. It's a free country, right? …kinda. I know what you mean, though, about wanting to say things and not being able to.

    By the way, I feel honored that you thought my bachelor post was so funny. Mostly because I think you're hilarious and intellectual and you write things in a very clever and entertaining way. So it was a high compliment to me that you thought what I said was funny 🙂 Thank you!

    Reply
  3. Feb 29, 2012
    Debbie

    What a great post! It's so thought-provoking! I am thinking all sorts of things like
    * what do my posts say about me?
    * wouldn't this be a great summarizing activity for students?
    * what makes us unwilling to show our true selves?
    * what would my true self be???
    Thank you so much!

    Reply
  4. Feb 29, 2012
    adrienne

    Moderate liberal? Oxymoron, but me too.

    Reply