This post has been sitting at the bottom of my brain basin for a long time, waiting to surface at the right moment. I actually wrote the majority of this post before the Mormon Facebook Apocalypse of 2015. Still, I’ve held onto this post. I think the time is finally right, as I confront the painful, vulnerable fact that I’ve been spiritually wounded. This is a loaded admission, one that opens up your soul to further misunderstanding, judgment, and (perhaps most terrifyingly and only in a few extreme cases) ire.
To my students at Christmastime: What do I want you to know most? About English? About High School? About Life?
In an effort to get my students in the spirit of Transcendentalism and to “Simplify, simplify, simplify!” I have asked my students to create their own personal “Walden” of sorts.
Some people–some actually nice people–have permanent scowls. It’s not that they are in any way distraught, but their default face just kinda forms into a natural stink-eye.
I think this was most eloquently described in the movie Juno:
Juno says: Your little girlfriend gave me the stink-eye in art class yesterday.
Bleaker replies: Katrina’s not my girlfriend, alright? And I doubt she gave you the stinkeye that’s just how her face looks, you know? That’s just her face.
Then, we cut to Katrina De Voort:
For Perma-Scowlers, I always just hope they’re also beautiful because I think the life of a Perma-Scowler might be a lonely existence. They are so immediately alienating that no one dares to crack beneath the surface of the slanted eyebrows!
So next time someone gives you a big old crusty, counterbalance by giving them a hug! If they resume scowling but otherwise seem pleased, you will know that’s just the way their face looks. If they hit you after, you might assume they were scowling for a reason. But they might still have needed a hug.
*I do not endorse hugging Kristen Stewart.
This morning I did a braid, turned around, and asked Jeremy if it looked alright in the back. He replied, “I think so,” and then became surprised when I immediately took it out.
“Wait!” he cried, “I meant it looks fine!”
“Exactly,” I told him, attempting another braid.
I’ll admit it, as the Pinterest craze took off, I felt a little superior for not buying into it. I started a couple of boards and thought–This is stupid, why am I pinning all of these things I can’t afford, won’t make, and can’t make for a house I don’t have? [Insert turned-up nose here.]
|Jef Holm, everybody.|
- Do you gangle?
- Do the sleeves of your t-shirt poke up because you have no muscle to grab the fabric?
- Do you have limited athletic ability?
- Is there a thrift store near by?
|Skinny. White. Cool.|